Hey! It's Dr.Seuss's Birthday, I Say...

Thanks for sharing, I actually wrote a parody of "The Grinch."

cool. where can i read it?

Well, I can post it here for you, but it is PG-13 rated and involves the band, The Who, as a word play "all the who's in Whoville." If you are still intersted, let me know, and I can post it. I just wanted to warn you because I didn't want to offend you, since you are a Dr. Seuss fan.

its cool, i don't get offended easily. i'm sure 10 year old me would have been offended, but i'm older now.

Ok, here goes:

All the Whos in Whoville-a Parody by Me

All The who fans in Whoville
Thought Christmas was great
But mean ol’ Keith Moon,
Who lived on top of the mountain
Was filled with hate.

Keith loathed Christmas
And all the time it took preparing
All those packages, and presents, and warmth bearing!
Some say that his brain wasn’t quite right
Some say that his pants were too tight.
But the most logical explanation of all
Was that he plain just had some gall!

What everyone thinks,
His bran or his pants,
He stood outside on Christmas Eve
Loathing The Who fans
Looking down his mountain with disdain,
Where their ridiculous festival was anything but plain.
He would peep through doors and windows
And plainly see
People getting drunk at the Christmas party!

“And they’re wearing their lampshades,” he growled then burped
“In hours the holiday will come, and my will shall be usurped.”
Then he frowned and grabbed his crotch, looking down.
“I’ve got to stop this madness!” he said with a trademark frown.

As the next day
He knew
All The Who fans would wake
And what a racket they would make.
With their merry laugher! Laughter! Laughter! Laughter!
He could not stand all the drunken laughter! Laughter! Laughter!
Laughter!

Then The Who fans, young and gaining, would sit down to pig out!
And they’d pig out! And they’d pig out!
And they’d pig out!
Pig out!
Pig out! (Oink!)
They would feast on Humble Pie and Meatloaf,
Which Keith Moon hated very much
And THEN
They’d do something to make him howl in pain
Every Who fan I Whoville would all stand again
With their arms around each other,
After having gathered their wits
They would stand all around and sing The Who’s Greatest Hits!
They’d sing! And they’d laugh!
And’ they’d sing, drink, belch, and sing!
The more Keith Moon pondered the Who-song,
The more he thought “I’ve put up with this for too long!”
For thirty-two years, I’ve heard their awful voices.
“I know that I have to eliminate their choices!
And how!”

Then a thought popped in his head!
A mean thought!
“I’ve got it!’
He said

“Here’s how I will go!” Keith Moon laughed again
And fashioned a Santa Clause outfit and then
Laughed his lunatic laugh, “Why didn’t I think
Of this before?
I look just like the jolly fat man—time to settle the score!”

“Now where’s that stinkin’ reindeer?”
Keith Moon searched his mountain-cave.
Nothing resembled a reindeer at all, save
For his turbo –powered boat.
“Yep, this thing should work!”
But he did not iron out every quirk.
“Now, I’ll show them that I’m no jerk!”

NEXT
He tool out some trash bags
That be bummed from some old hags
Then he got on his turbo-powered boat,
That he swore was sturdier than a goat.

And he yelled his yell “Coming through!”
As the boat skidded down
To the land of the bad Karaoke singers,
Who’ve already lit up the town.

The windows were lit, but there were far too drunk
To notice the slightest noise or PLUNK!
Keith Moon’s boat his a wall, but he was not sunk!

The first door was a tight squeeze,
But if FATSO could do it, then so could he!
But removed himself fast,
All their drunken fools he passed
They were too busy partying to care
To notice any foul stench in the air
(Keith Moon ripped one!)
Then he went to the tree and filled up some sacks,
Lucky that everyone had turned their backs!
Took all the bloody presents, who knew?
Stocking stuffers too
He grinned and said “That’ll show every damn Who!”

Next, he tiptoed to the fridge with cheer
To raid for all the food and beer
Keith Moon even had the nerve to unleash
Every Who’s favorite brand of hashish!

Then, he went back to the door.
“Those fools should know I’ll be back for more!”

As he bent down to retrieve a fallen toy,
Keith Moon heard a rough-sounding voice yell, “Oi!”
He turned to see Roger Daltrey staring at him
So much for escaping on a whim!

For once, fear struck this cold-hearted man,
Then he felt sorry that this whole thing ever began.
“What the hell are you doing with all our crap?”
Even unflinching Keith Moon knew the man’s voice sounded gruff.

Keith Moon was at a great loss for words, though he was slick.
He thought of some B.S. to say, and he thought of it quick!
“Er, well, they sent the wrong presents, and the food is no good.”
“Well, what kind of a rotten, no-good hood…?”
He cut Roger off, just as he thought he should,
“I’ll get everything fixed right, jolly good!”

And the drunk Roger believed every word he said,
Which was good for Keith Moon because he would have
Butted him with his head.
He then gave Roger some Vodka in a cup,
“I would’ve had my lip split if all this kept up!”

Then, the last thing he spotted
Was an unwrapped condom on the floor
Then craftily he picked it up
Before sneaking out the door.

And the last sip of Vodka
He chugged from his bottle
Was enough so get him going back, full throttle
THEN
The same process got
Started all over
As he crashed the other parties,
Decked out in Crimson And Clover.

Night was almost through
When the parties winded down
The Whos would go to bed soon
Then wake, only to frown.
He packed up his turbo boat
With all the food! The presents! The booze!
Then he wondered how long these drunken fools would snooze!

Up the ghastly mountain, Vile
He had to clear a space for the pile
Of all the new goodies he had obtained,
Thankful for alcohol that they had not abstained!
Keith Moon knew it would happen very soon
The Who’s will wake, all hung over, past noon.
“Now those dummies will know that this is no lampoon!”

Then the noise began to grow, Keith Moon poked out his ear
And he was ready to vomit at what he did hear!
Those idiots were singing even louder,
And without any gifts or Christmas clam chowder!

Their houses were still it,
And so were they!
It turned out after all
That Keith Moon couldn’t make them pay!

Then, he cursed and kicked the snow
And tried to think what to do
These people were a pesky bunch,
The party animals in the land of Who!

Could it be that they were happy, even without all their stuff?
This time, Keith Moon knew he had enough!
He couldn’t stop Christmas at all.
It was there
Then he began to care…

“I hate all this noise; I hate all this ruckus!”
Don’t these idiots all know it’s just bupkis!
I filled up the sacks
While they turned their backs.
And those ninnies still sing
Like this was their thing.
This exercise was far too tiring,
So their stuff back I will bring!

Then, he rode down the mountain slope
To return all their stupid junk.
But this time, he knew that he’d be assertive,
Keith Moon does not take any guff!
When everyone saw he’s come over, pissed
Their things they didn’t even know they missed
Knowing this was his only chance for peace and quiet,
Keith Moon, stood up tall, he was a whipped pup!
“Merry Christmas! Here’s your stuff! Now will you bastards please shut up!”

How the Grinch Stole Christmas and all related works © Dr. Seuss.

haha. pretty cool play on Whoville with The Who fans. this could be a hit with adults especially with illustrations.

Thanks, I'm glad you liked it. :)